QQ Chip-Chip

With the influence of Astro Animal Planet series, my kids requested to keep pet dog, alternatively anything to do with furry 4 legged animals such as cat, rabbit, hamster & mouse. I ruled out all the possibilities as I am allergy to fur & dust.

Recently read an article on benefit of children keeping pets will increase their ability to nurture and care for others, have an easier time interacting with their peers, increased emotional reciprocity and sense of responsibility.

With this scientific evidence, I tend to give in and agreed for them to keep a pair of miniature Bantam chicken (http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Bantam_%28chicken%29).
On the next day, we were woke up abruptly by the terrible crowing noise from the rooster at 5:30 am, snoozed and repeatedly for the interval of 30 minutes and the last crow was 7 am.
We were so ashamed of the loud noise made in the mid of the quiet Taman, next, we wrap the cage with towel, hoping to let the rooster see no sun, but the rooster never failed its duty and continue to crow.

On the 3rd day, the hen laid an egg, and it continued to have one every alternate day. After collecting of her last egg, she sit on it, the chicks hatched after 20 days, but only 3 chicks made it, the rest were rest in the heaven.

My kids learned and benefited a lot during the 1.5 months period, caring, love & responsibility made them mature.

Cute, lovely and adorable !!

‘Sahara’ Office

Our central air con was not functioning due to certain reason, in exchange was electric fan that we brought from home. The office was enclosed without window and there was no way letting outside air flow in, it was like sauna and we ought to tie through the heat, humidity & stuffiness.

With lightning speed, those ‘candles’ colleagues that melt easily grabbed their shoes and moved down to another office enjoying wearing warmer with hot coffee cup to warm their palms. Left only few of us that wish to impress boss for better bonus, singing and hamming song by Ricky Nelson “I will follow you, follow you whenever you may go, there isn't an ocean too deep, A mountain so high it can keep me away….”

When the temperature raises high at 32.4C, I felt lethargic and mellow, my eyes were getting heavy and heavier, I need to staple my eyelids to stay awake, a long ruler was used to support my chin, to prevent my head from nodding uncontrollably. Crystal salt can be seen on my skin where I collected it home for cooking.

Dressing a little less, thin or light was one of the best method to wand off the heat, the naughty hungry wolves (male colleagues) were licking saliva awaiting and welcoming to see revealing & see thru attire. (Forgotten the risk of heart attack, high blood pressure)

I saluted those working under sun light, respected them for their endurance to weather changes.

For us ? Longing to end the Sahara days in the shortest period ??

Teacher Veejay & His Student

My 6 years old little L was promoted to become teacher Veejay by my Indon helper (my son liked the name Veejay), she was very grateful that my son taught her English & Mandarin, she used a brown exercise book to pen down words and learn how to pronounce it.

Teacher Veejay arranged tuition for her on weekdays and rest on weekend. Sometimes, teacher Veejay got angry as she was absent minded and failed her spelling, she would get 10 times ear squad or 10 times correction as punishment.

On one beautiful fine day, my helper over joy and told me that there was this Malay guy proposed marriage to her. Thunder, lightning & rain showered onto my head, my face was sure longer than Prince Charles, she had breached her promised by befriended to stranger. Being high in EQ I kept the fear inside me, just cautious her to beware of naughty man who seeks for free sex.

A few days later, my helper again confessed to me that she was in love with a Ban-ga-lai (Bangladeshi) , he was very handsome, he would ride his black steel horse (bicycle) round our house during weekend. She was thankful to teacher Veejay as he had bridged both of them together by translating the English letter.

To me I consider lucky that she was frank to let me know the happening, and I had taken drastic action to stop further development. As for Teacher Veejay, he will be putting up in day care from next month onwards, as for mending the house, another mature maid was engaged.

Coffee, Panadol & Cigarette

My 20 years old young helper was with us for 10 months now, we went through chicken & duck talk, miscommunication, surprises & culture shock before we can come to the present stage of understanding.

After she had completed her routine, she would come round to tell me tales of her village, her brought up. She would pour out her true feeling towards her family, her divorced husband, relatives and her friends. I must be motherly enough for her to behave like a daughter than a helper. I am also trying to empty out her sad soul so that she can work whole heartedly & happily for two years.

At her young age, she had developed some habits that annoyed me, first was her addictions to coffee, 1 mug every 2 hourly or 8 mug in a day. Anything less will cause her to have severe headache, and panadol will be replacement of coffee. Lately, she had cut down coffee intake to 2 mugs, but the panadol increase to 8 tablets daily. Oh yes, too much coffee will cause constipation, and she need banana, papaya or medication to help in easing or ‘pang sai’.

Secondly, she was a chain smoker, there was once, she hopped in front of me, putting two palms together begging for 1 stick of cigarette, ‘Madam, please please, I just need one stick, maybe it will cure my headache, please lah, madam.’ She knee down and begged. “NO” was the stern response, she was a bit upset and said, “This is god will, Jesus disallows me to smoke, Jesus uses madam to guide me.”

Sigh… will I be able to tame her wild soul that she had suppressed for months? I doubt and started to bit my nails ….

Working Life as a Secretary - Contd Part 3 Final

Thing turns sour when the stalker came to know about the police plot. I am planning the worst, started to think of how to co-ordinate funeral ceremony & pek kim collection.

I am suspicious on all the incoming parcel, maybe bomb was attached in it, and I would be blow off together with my boss. I avoid walking with boss for fear that the gunman gun me down wrongly. I brought my own water for fear the pantry water was poisoned.

To my very surprised that the phone went quiet and my boss still alive and working everyday, the police no more showing faces. I am like riding the roller coaster up in the peak and suddenly dropped on the ground. I was puzzled and started my back lane investigation.

Later, some news leak out that the whole things took over by our HR Manager, the bargaining went on and we had the good deal of paying 4-figures instead of 6-figures ransom.

Our HR Manager was asked to bring the cash in newspaper wrapping and put into brown envelope. He was asked to go to a few destinations to wait for calls, later, he was asked to go to Komtar car park.

“Mr xxx, now that I can see you in 2nd level car park, walk in between the white cars, drop the money down to the ground floor, don’t look down, walk away and don’t look back. I will give you a call to confirm the ransom”. This was the instruction given by the stalker on the last move.

While I am busy typing my meeting minutes, unexpectedly I received the call from the stalker, my heart pumped 100 times faster, but this time, he was in joyous mood, he thanked me for the co-operation, and sorry for all the troubles he had caused. He passed message to my boss, saying that my boss will be ‘protected’ and everything was over.

True, the whole thing back to normal, my boss was free of mental harassment, but he wasn’t ready to stay any further and went back to Taiwan for good.

Here ends the final part of my life as a Secretary. Interesting ? Perhaps not, I am stressed out during the 6 months period.

‘Thing’ that haunted me for years

When I was in primary school, we gathered and whispering about the long hair white gown woman in the toilet. No one had ever seen her, but my classmate said, ‘my friend saw her’, and another friend confirmed that her friend’s friend saw her too. Since then, we went to toilet in group, avoid using the cubicle next to the locked cubicle, which we believed that something was inside there. More so, some blood stains on the floor makes us believed that she did something to the student. No matter how, I will not do my big business in the toilet for fear of meeting up with her.

During secondary school, our classroom was 20 feet next to the Chinese cemetery, where we can see clearly the names on the tomb stones, our classroom was dim and cooling, could be caused by too ‘Yin’. After the final school exam, the teacher was busy marking the paper, we were playing the coin spirit game (Ouigi Game) at the back. White sheet paper was prepared, “Home” was wrote in the middle of the paper, the rest will be some wordings, numbers, and depending on what question we asked. We will had our index fingers put on the coin and start calling ‘spirit coin, please come out, spirit coin, please come out’, the spirit coin would move and we were excited to raise questions. Sometimes, the coin moved so fast that made us feel scared and we signal each other and sent the coin back to its home. At times, some passed away celebrities liked singer or film star would join us in the game.

I was away to put up in hostel during my college time, I was terrified to stay alone in a room, I would keep the music and lighting on for 24 hrs. Avoided ghost story movie, ghost story book, ghost related conversation. No drinking at night to prevent walking in the corridor to the toilet, I would not answer or look back if anyone calling from behind during night time. No mirror after 12 mid night.

The fear kept inside me for years, I will not look into rear mirror if I am driving at night, my house lighting will be turn on at 6:30pm or even earlier, my house will be painted in white nothing but white, once a while, I would sprinkle salt in every corner of the house to chase away the bad vibes. To my kids, I never mentioned or frighten them with ghost, they were much much more braver, they sleep alone, walk in the dark, and foremost, never believe in ghost.

Two years back, I went for hypnotherapy to get rid of the illusion of the long hair white gown woman that haunted me for years. Now, I am much braver than before, and the therapy serves the purpose.

Working Life as a Secretary…. part 2

I was shivering upon reaching my boss, telling him about the 4 coffins he needs to prepare. His face was black with char burned smell.

Police was invited to join in and made things more complicated. My phone was installed with recorder machine. I lost the privileges of spot checking my husband where about, teaching my son on mathematics, giving recipe and coaching my maid how to cook.

Some gossip and reliable source told me that boss was being stalked and asked to pay RM100K for his life. The whole thing was run by a syndicate that targeted the expatriates in Malaysia.

My duty as a gate keeper had provoked the anger of the stalker, I was warned of my in-out safety, feeling disturbed and wanted very much to move my home next to police station.

After a few weeks of ding-dong, negotiation had came to the stage of settlement, our HR Manager impersonated by police to hand over the ransom, the Hollywood play cast came into the real life, a few check points was planned, but in between the police failed to answer some questions correctly whereby the stalker called off the plan.

Immediately, I received the ferocious call in the office, ‘Your boss is asking for trouble by involving the police, get his wife to collect his death body soon !!!” my ear was deafening by the loud slammed on the phone.

To be continued…. Part 3 final

Working Life as a Secretary…. part 1

For god know what reason I ended up as a Secretary, this is not the ambition that I used to fill in the student survey form throughout my school days neither did it appear in my assay writing. (or karangan)

I worked for this Taiwanese but not so Taiwanese boss from US, his English was above excellent. Giving us the illusion of seeing teacher than boss, and we started to use dictionary for words that he said and wrote.

Everything went normal for a year, but, things went wrong somewhere after that, boss had reacted strangely, he become suspicious and sensitive, he gave me a name list on the phone call that he wish to answer, other than that I was given opportunity to practice my creativity on how to lie. My mom once told me that I will go to hell and get my tongue cut repeatedly if I lie, I hope I can transfer this to my boss.

Later, an ex-army force officer was engaged as driver cum bodyguard, more so the driver was armed with short gun to execute his job.

Upon screening the calls, I noticed this Chinese guy used to call up at 3 times daily. I went on with my routine “boss in meeting, boss went out, boss outstation, boss in the production, etc, etc..”. And my list was long enough for me to lie continuously 5 days, soon, this guy went on impatient.

On one beautiful fine day, I got his call when I was in the mid of polishing my nails, I was asked to take down the message for my boss, “ Please get Mr XXX to prepare 4 sets of coffins if he did not answer my call”. Click, the phone went off, my nail file dropped, my jaws dropped and I freeze there for more than 10 seconds without heart pumping…..

Dear readers, interesting right ? to be continued, kekeke…

Wheels Power

A family (2 adults, 3 school going kids & a house helper) had the following luxuries:-





1. Sedan car for husband to work
2. 4-wheel drive for wife to work
3. MPV (minivan or multi-purpose vehicle) to ferry the whole family on Sat & Sun
4. Motorcycle for nearby or short distance conveniences

The above arrangement sounded nearly perfect and draw envy from contiguous even car enthusiasts.

The untold true was it could become burdensome to the car keeper. Refer the following to-do-list behind the wheel.

1. MUST warm up the MPV weekly
2. MUST warm up the motorcycle weekly
3. MUST clean it at least once a week
4. MUST maintain & service the vehicles quarterly
5. MUST have enough space for parking
6. MUST prevent from exposing to sunlight
7. MUST earn enough to pay for road tax, insurance, maintenance, fuel & other hidden cost

TINSTAAFL or there is no such thing as a free lunch.

A story for everybody – Apology Ceremony

Late 30s couple were surprised that their 5 years old son walked back home from kindergarten (6 houses away) after school, obviously, the school was to be blamed for the safety ignorance. With the hot steam sizzling out from the wife's head, she dragged her son walked marching angrily towards the school, and the school principal get these types " #% % ^&&@ $+ $# " of complaint, the last few sentences ended clearly with “ You people don’ t know who my husband was, he will not let anyone of you at large, you will be sorry for it !!”.

An apology was needed for the negligence act. The principal & her husband were requested to come forward for the apology "ceremony", auspicious day & time were chosen from the 'Tong Shu' book (Chinese Almanacs), the principal needs to provide mandarin oranges, red cloth, Kim hua' (praying ornament) and ‘ang pow’ (red packet) for the ceremony, the apology will have to make towards the 5 years old boy, not the parent.

This had become the hot talk in our Taman (housing area), lots of caring and concerned friends, neighbors, Mee seller aunties and kuih seller uncle chip in their opinions, lawyers were consulted to give professional view. 2 weeks later, the couple changed their mind and agreed to waive all the requirements except the apology & mandarin oranges.

The story ended with the couple stop their kids from schooling in the kindergarten. The principal had her school security beef up. And I had my little L study in the same school with better security and safer environment.

Milk Buddha at Mahindarama Buddhist Temple

PMR, SPM & STPM exams are round the corner, fingers and toes are enough to do the count down. All students, teachers, parents, aunties, uncles, grandpa, granny are equivalent worry & panic. Even the gods can not be spared but to do the helping as well.

I had visited the popular Milk Buddha in Penang, most of the students shall make the trip before their exam, bringing with them are bottles of milks for the offering, and the exam time table with their name, school, class, dates of exam plus their wish (e.g. 12As). Tuition centers will normally organise bus load full of students to the temple for the blessing.

The examination blessing has 60 years of history, a massive blessing will be carried just weeks before the examination. The blessing will enhance and boost up the students confident level, and calm down the butterfly in the stomach.

Mahindarama Temple had a library, kindergarten, cafeteria, clinic, old folk home, monk quarters & lecture hall. Environment is calm and peaceful.

Wind-Water

Both of us decided to get ‘nest’ of our own after years of ‘parasite’ on my in law home. We finally agreed on the semi-detach property, I was busy dreaming of how to decorate it to become the model house of the whole BM or at least the whole Taman.

My pillow partner came round to tell his concern on Feng Shui (The words 'feng shui' literally translate as "wind-water"in English), I was kind of getting cold ice showered in the winter, feeling furious as to why he still didn’t believed the astronauts in the moon ? There were no ‘Chang Er’(Chinese fairy), neither do there had the tree and rabbit in the moon.

Coincidently, Lillian Too the Feng Shui master was in town to promote her books, I decided to bring my hammer to tear down her Feng Shui signboard, I want to see and know how the Feng Shui cheat all the people especially my so called ‘Educated’ partner.

I went with my brother, at least two people do the tearing job easier. There were packed in the hotel seminar hall, Lillian Too introduced Feng Shui in a scientific way and manner, everything was so true, so real, so promising and yet there were evidence of Feng Shui.

Yours truly was totally convinced in the short 2 hours talk, both my brother and myself had forgotton our mission, and ended up buying more than 8 books each, waited like the little fans in the queue of 1KM long getting Lillian to autograph. I left the hall without bringing the hammer back.

Now, my brother was a staunch Feng Shui practitioner where I had decorated my home according to all Feng Shui aspects. And I also become 10 times more Feng Shui than my partner.

I deserve the Best DRESS Award

Dressing accordingly is important for work area, when I was in the college, we were taught on grooming and deportment, to make sure that we don’t wear bikini and pyjamas to work.

Since then I change my wardrobe to office wear, blouse, shirt, skirt, scarf, accessories and pantyhose -> (guys, I hope u know what is this).

Of lately, there was this engineer commented that I have wrong color matching, maybe at times, I just overlook. So, I just be a bit cautious and spend some time in front of wardrobe.

Not long later, I put on brown turtle neck long sleeve blouse where the fabric had some glittering gold line, and the same engineer smiled and told me that I look like the person working in the bar (or bar girl in the good old day). I am cursing him in my mind that he gets strike by the signboard on the 5 foot walkway. So, I spend a little more time in front of wardrobe again.

I love being look slim when the weighing machine doesn’t co-operate with me, I dress up black with black panty hose, here comes the fat engineer popping his head on my cubicle, smiling with naughy look and said ‘mommy, I will present you a broom.’ ‘You look just like the witch’. Before I could respond he zooms off with hehehehee…. Sounded very much like the wicked wizard riding on the broom. If I am the real witch, I will turn him into big big and fat fat mee-ku bun (Chinese pink bun), throw him in Somalia and save the people there with no famine for next 5 years.

Years later, I started used to the comment given, ‘looks like principal, butler, spinster, cow boy, stage performer etc. etc’.

Being able to dress for many characters, I truly believed that I deserve the Best Dress Award. And if I have the magic wand, I will make sure famine free in Africa, India and other part of the world that need me.

916 Gold or ??

When women mentioned 916, it means gold, but when men mentioned 916, it means political restructuring.

Today is 916, where it was a great day everybody looks forward, I went out to do marketing, everything seems peaceful and calm, except the uncle and aunties pointing at the newspaper talking about 916.

I was advised to stock some dry stuff, hmmm… just in case something turns up to be not so pleasant.

Over the dinner during Mooncake Festival, 916 was our dessert, the kia su me speaks like the expert telling how I help boost the economy by buying excessive food to weather the unforeseen circumstances. My brother said loudly with surprise, ‘huh ?? You are still talking about storing food yah ? We are talking about keeping cash and passport to get out of the mess.”
I was stunned and got caught over their advancement in Crisis Management, yah wor… just like the Vietnam war then, everybody got excess to overseas with their accumulated wealth, those poor one will have to stay put and suffer.

I sink down and rooted in the chair silently thinking how to cash out my account, sell share, sell unit trust, sell house, sell land, buy gold, renew passport, book air ticket, etc & etc. Haiyoh… too much of thinking caused my brain to shock the brain waive circuit, putting extra weight for me to shoulder over 916 visions.

Sigh… we are just the commoner where we just merely hope of peace and stability.

Hot or Very Hot

Our office temperature was set high to conserve electricity, some kind of costs saving project initiated by some kind of nation from desert. Our complaint will be either hot or very hot.

The females will be seen as dressing less, lighter & thinner, from long sleeve to short sleeve, from thick to thin, from broad strap to spaghetti strap, from maxi to mini skirt. The male had no way to change, but to let go a few more shirt buttons to expose the non sexy hairy chest.

For female, no point putting on make up as it will get melt, the mascara will flow down like river, the face compact powder will get soak and crack like the desert floor.

This month – September, we experienced frequent rains, this is the first time in the year where we actually get the feeling of “cold” in the office, super nice temperature of 22.8C, and just like spring in Australia, (minus the flowers)

We were seen in long sleeve and some of us were putting on warmer.

We happened to bump into the ‘desert nation’, where he questioned us with cared and concerned, ‘you people feeling cold yah?” Without hesitation I answer “No, just that I got fever.” Another colleague of mine answered that she had Hypothyroidism. So, it is common to feel cold despite the hot temperature.

No matter how, we will never admit that we feel cold for fear that the temperature will be adjusted higher and hit further cost saving target.

Passion for Pet - Part 1

After watching too much of Astro program on Animal Planet, my home ended up with a lot of surprise visitors namely cat, dog, bird, frog, spider, monitor lizard, grasshopper, beetle, dragonfly, and yet to know animals.

There was once that my son V brought this big black spider back from school, the size was 4” to 5” wide, it is kind of scary looking creature. V promised to let it go after keeping it just for a week, but an hour later the scary spider went missing in V’s room. We search fanatically and turn his room into tsunami scene, but no avail, my little 6 yrs boy L asked, “Mom, is the spider poisonous? Will it be hiding some where in the dark toilet, n sting us on our bum?”, I was stunned and cool sweat rolling down from my forehead, the spiderman scene came flashing in my mind, we call for immediate evacuation, to move the 2 boys to my room for the night. We keep all the doors closed in V’s room, we stuffed fabric underneath the door gap, and close all windows to ensure that spider was trap in the room without at large to elsewhere.

I have endless spider man dream on the night, human crawling on the wall, human head spider body, giant spider, cob web, and unexpected monster scene.

Our search continues when the sun rises again, I am armed with mosquito spray and butterfly net, where V with just a plastic container (hmmm… he still hoping to get that thing alive), I am extra cautious & careful, for fear that it fall from the ceiling, or it crawl up my leg.

V managed to capture the spider with least effort……….what a great relief. Unfortunately, this did not serve as a deterrent, yet we still receive weird visitors from time to time.

Boss?? Books !!

I believe my boss past life was a teaching professor, his passion in teaching is being carried forward to this present life. I truly believe that we were his formal student before and continue to be.

Now working for him, we were given assignment after assignment, we were given book, periodic & magazine to read, to understand, to discuss, to summary and to present our assignment in PowerPoint, and we are rated for our presentation performance.

Sigh… how can we improve our speed from 1 book in 2 years to 1 book in 2 months?

Sigh… the book keeps sending us to sleep, we need to use toothpick stand to keep our eyes open

How I wish that cash can be found in between the book ?

How I wish that it works like Chinese spirit medium, get the book burn , ashes mixed with water, drink it, sleep well, wake up and everything in our mind.

No matter how I wish, I still need to "chew up" & digest every single word in the book, get set and go for the presentation.

For the Ghost ? Deities ? or the Men ?

A group of aged aunties meet up for Tai Chi every morning in the park, they used to update the happening after the session.

On the recent Phor Tor or Hungry Ghosts Festival, one of them expressed utter disagreement for the ko tai (modern stage show) performance.

"Hai yoh yoh… the ‘Ko Tai' singers wear so less and so see thru, can see so much of her body" one of the silver hair auntie speak out loud.

"yah lor yah lor !! I can even see her panties when she do the dancing, really choy !! makes me poorer for not striking Magnum & Toto this week" the black mole auntie swings her towel with dismay. [Chinese believes bad luck upon see panties]

"How can this happen? Where is the respect shows to Tai Shu Yah God, and I feel shame to bring my grandson there, so shame shame ??” interrupted by white hair auntie.

The spicy gossips when on …. with their saliva showering the lawn.

The makeshift stage was located in the big field of the Taman, more than 100 plastic stools were provided for the audiences. The loud music blares throughout where the ENT doctor will walk smiling to the clinic with increasing patient. [ENT = Ear, Nose & Throat]

The front few rolls were occupied by the silver hair groups. Here comes the young, pretty show girl walking into the stage, she gains immediate welcome by the loud applause from uncles. Some uncles cling on to the very front stage where they have forgotten the advice they once given to the young for getting eyesight ruined by viewing too close.

With soft and sexy voice the singer murmured, every movement and gesture will thrill and hook on uncles’ naughty soul. Uncles go with the rhythm, making eyes contact, clapping with joy for song after song.

The fast-paced and loud music will make heart race faster, the sexy & revealing attire will cause nose to bleed, and provoking dance will let the foamy saliva oozing out.

Is the ko tai for the Ghost ? Deities ? or the Men ?

My dad & Ms Freggie

My dad keeps a pet frog for his past time, the frog is named Freggie, she is slim and sexy when she set foot in my family, she can hop and she is allowed to move freely from back lane to kitchen and to bathroom. She lives on the insect crawling & flying in my house with her powerful long sticky tongues.

The time has come when both ant & fly extinct in my home, to sustain her life, my dad started to hunt for her food, dad will go round neighbor houses, neighbor taman, his office, my office and every where with the plastic swap, the flies will make the delicious meal for Freggie.

Whenever Ms Freggie appears in the toilet, my mom will strike 4D, so Freggie unofficially become our God of Cai-Sheng (the wealthy god that brings money).

I happened to bump into Freggie last week, Freggie had since changed a lot, she stay permanently in the toilet, she put on a lot of weight and shape like Chinese ‘mee-ku’ bun (Chinese pink bun), her legs no longer afford her heavy body weight, and she lost her ability to hop, in fact, she crawls like a tortoise, and she looks like the ugly toad in the Star War movie.

I sigh…. and sigh again….

Taste Buds Party

To breakaway the plain, tasteless & healthy diet at home, we choose to pamper our taste buds by dining out during weekend, in replace with all the so call garbage and unhealthy food.

The less healthy the tastier it is, we responded by licking and polishing the plates, the restaurant owner welcome us by giving further discount for helping in cleaning.

In practical, we eat what ever eatable, those fly in the sky, run on the earth and swim in the water, except the‘phor tor’ food offer to the ‘Hungry Ghost’.

There are also times that we found ourselves trapped into the maze with the ‘ciak har mi?’ (what to eat?) puzzles.

To unsolved it, I started to find out from ‘tam ciak’ friends, colleagues, neighbours and off lately move on to blogs hopping.

I bumped across the following 2 sites that introducing food throughout Malaysia, especially where I stay - Bukit Mertajam & Penang.

Here are the link:-
Malaysia Food Blog, Malaysia Travel Blog (http://www.vkeong.com/)
Penang Tua Pui (http://www.penangtuapui.com/)

My taste buds have since been partying all weekend long.

Bon Appetite!

Go Green for a Week

Green Environment Week was carried in our work area, to show our support, employees were encouraged to dress in green on the last day of the week.

Our office partitions were green, chairs were green, and with the green outfit makes us look like trees in the jungle.

Going green has stirred a whirlpool in our deadly ‘mourning’office. Our routine greeting of “good morning, chin jia ai kun nia (so sleepy) become :-
- Wau, you so green
- Wau lau eh.. green shoes, green hair pin, green ear ring
- Yee! your green is not green enough
- Wei, this is called green meh?
- (whisper) Boss got wear green bor?

Sharing the going Green topic, office politic was put aside, stabbing knife, screw driver and throwing dart were kept in the drawers, making the environment peaceful and harmony without pollution.

Later in the green afternoon, some suggested to those that wearing green but not green enough to have their eye sight examine, some suggested to save the green by squeezing out the so green & too green ink from the shirt for office use (need to wet the shirt first before squeezing), some suggested to staple green leaves on those who did not wear green. Some suggested to collect some fund to buy green outfit for those who don’t have it. Some suggested to use stabilo highlighter to get the face paint. Oops… some suggest to contribute green hat for guy (green hat is taboo in Chinese, meaning that girl friend or wife is cheating by having affair)

Hmmm…. here comes the war again.

See our Green pokok at work

Beware!! We have Ah Long in the office

Getting loan from finance or bank, you risk your property being seal or tow away.

Getting loan from Ah Long, you risk your life, and get famous in no time, where your house is being paint, or your photostated IC posted in the whole Taman lamp post, and you can also partner with Micheal Chong to scold Ah Long in the newspaper.

In office, not paying your colleague promptly, you will get paint, seal & popularity as well.

This incident happened in my office, where RM9.22 KFC lunch bill was involved. Paint was seen all over the office cubicle, the entrance was sealed with masking tape, computer was spilled with paint, threatening notes were seen everywhere in the office.

See ... blue collar Ah Long at large in the office.

You too, deserve a laugh

My colleagues recommended these two comedians’ sites, where it tickled my funny bone and I was laughing my head off. They are so funny and comical. View thru and you too, deserve a great laugh.

1. Russell Peters - Canadian based comedian. Features include biography, news, press releases, concert dates, gallery, FAQs, forum, weblog and merchandise. His Youtube videos have been viewed by over 6 million individual viewers (you may view his talk by viewing in Youtube

2. Comedy court - The Malaysia’s foremost Comedy Courtiers, Allan Perera and Indi Nadarajah. (Since 1996 they have delighted us in their alter egos as Loga and Singam, Mat and Din, the Two Dato’s, KC and TC, Myrtle and Thavi in such memorable acts as Quid Pro Quo, Res Ipsa Loquitur, The Executive Spa, Who wants to be a Billionaire, Men-a-pause, The Usual Suspects and The Comedy Court Review).

Hope you enjoy it.

Desperate Hawkers

Young Mei Mei, my colleague went out to tar-pao (take away) chicken rice for us, the tao-ge-soh (lady boss) was nice and friendly to her, flattering her with all the complement she get in a year, whispered softly in her ear telling her that she is giving extra Asam soup, for she like her very much, she gave Mei Mei her name card, just by the call in advance, she will enjoy express service where waiting time is eliminated.

Mei Mei was impressed and we got tao-ge-soh story as a side dish for lunch, her happy soul was hovering in the air, showing her 3 middle fingers she swear that she would be faithful to tao-ge-soh and eat chicken rice for the rest of her working life. I almost throw out my last mouth full of rice...

The same night, I went to road side hawker to get some ‘pao’ (bun), pao was sold off and the tao-ge (boss) suggested a long list of other things, I yawned and told them I only want pao, tao-ge immediately gave me a name card, and recited the same thing Mei Mei get (minus he likes me lah), no waiting time, save petrol, prompt service, bla, bla, bla. I yawned again… ‘enough tao-ge, I promised to call you when I need pao yah…’, I cut short the conversation.

Sigh… the recent petrol price rocketing has caused everyone to strive harder to keep life moving, maybe tao-ge-soh need to sell 200 instead of 150 boxes of chicken rice to make end needs, and tao-ge needs to sell 200 pao instead of 100....

Yoh! I have got FREE PHONE from TMB

Since my last encounter with TMB on the streamyx issue, both TMB & I have got our relationship entangled, we are no other but snow white, Cinderella and their step mother.

Yesterday, TMB called, trying to lure me to TM office, claiming that I owe them April streamyx bill, my intuition told me that TM could have found new potion for me, well, if I failed to settle within 14 days, they will bring Kapal Singh (lawyer) to see me.
I took emergency leave to TM, the meeting was carried out in harmony mood, they acted professionally, explaining and trying to make me feel comfortable with their mistake on the billing, well, well, this soothe me down. And I choose to take the potion apple by paying the April overdue bill.

Before the hand shake, I told TM that I need to purchase a set of new phone, they offer me a rebate of RM50 if I bring in the old phone, wao wao !! I was screaming with joy inside me, but still acted cool and calm to stay feminine.

Hehehe… laughing inside me, this is too good to be true, I proceed to the phone counter to make my selection so that I can be back on the next day to pick up the set.
The sales person checked thru my phone record, told me that they are giving me a free phone, ah yoh yoh !! FREE PHONE ler… I kind of too stun to react, freeze and lost conscious for 30 seconds, how could this happen? I never bang & break their table legs, never bring petrol & match stick, and why are they treating me so good & special. Can anyone lend me a shoulder for me to cry……? It was so so touching… 100 times more touching than watching Indian movie.

At home, I am toying with the new phone features, still wondering why and how I get the phone free.
“Why am I entitled for free phone?”
“Is free phone giving out to everyone?”
“How to qualify for the free phone?”

My above questions remain a mist and unanswered by TM, strange yah, they are giving it out for good course but not doing it openly to the public.

Sun Barbecue

During our family gathering last weekend, my niece was surrounded with concerned aunties, never wish to left behind I am trying to set foot in, struggle with both my hands to part the crowd (like buka durian).

Her mum was coaxing her to remove her hands which she had covered her face and take off her spectacles to show her sun burn. “Ah yoh !!” was the word uttered simutaneously by the crowd, and the busy-caring aunties questioned non-stop, before she could response, the busy aunties came out with all the solution and suggestion.

To me she looks like panda in the negative film, face tan with 2 white rings around her eyes. Such an adorable looks.

To prevent the burn, sunblock is needed, it will help to protect our skin by abosorbing / reflecting UVA and UVB, sunblocks have a Sun Protection Factor (SPF) rating. The SPF rating indicates how long a sunscreen remains effective on the skin.

Here are some calculation on the SPF rating:-

SPF 15 x 10 = 150 minutes (2.5 hrs)

** Same fomula applies to SPF 30, 45, 60 or more.

Meaning that SPF 15 will be effective & protect us from the sun for up to 150 minutes, then reapplied every two hours if required.

Sunscreens should be applied 15 -20 minutes before sun exposure to allow a protective film to develop, then reapplied after water contact and sweating.

With this, we can avoid being barbecue by the sun, and free to go for any outdoor activities such as beach games, swimming, picnic, fishing & so on.

Enjoy our sunny day !!

Mommy Choo – the gangster way !!

After 5 years of serious consideration, I finally waived my white hanky to agree on the installation of streamyx for home use. I seriously believe that this will end years of cursing I get from my teens, I don’t mind them cursing me riches but concern if they spell me for getting age.

The 1st ‘honeymoon’ month was great, we go round boosting & promoting the use of streamyx, I was that close from getting advertising fee from TMnet.

Unfortunately, good days never last forever, my internet connection was frequently interrupted, the longest connection will be 10 ~ 15 mins, can’t stand the mental tortured & pressured from my teens, I started calling for help, I always believe & portrait myself as educated & civilised people, politeness & mannerism come first, I am patience listener and follow instruction given by the TMnet technical assistant.

I jotted down all the steps they instructed, knowing how to do simple verification, at the end of the 2nd month, modem & port have been replaced to curb the problem.

Unfortunately, the frequent interruption still persisted. My teens started to seek fun outside, lepak in supermarket, visit friends, and giving **‘Dalmatian’ reasons to leave the house, haiyoh… I was deeply depressed.

In return, the TM technical assistant was getting call from me every nite at 11 pm, just like reminding them to take medicine before bed. Slowly, I find them no longer human being, but a recording machine, the procedure was repeated from day after day.

My decent complaint turn hysterical, the last call I told them was, “I don’t care how but you got to rectify it, and I am taking half day leave to bang and break your table legs. If still can not settle, I will bring **1 litre of petrol together with matches." I behaved & sounded very much like ah long asking for debt…

Hey presto ! the service was express, the site tech called me up the next day during public holiday, and get it fix on the day morning. I feel so so syok….

Now, shaking my leg eating ‘kua chee’ watching my teens doing their frienster stuff. What a life !!


**Dalmatian = 101
**1 Litre petrol = due to petrol hike

When our petrol is cost more than mineral water

Petrol price skyrocketing, causing our pocket to burn and bleed. The sky of Malaysia covers with tons of negative vibes, all the grievances, complaints, curse & hatred form the dark grey cloud that float in the air.

Our office is unusually noisy, we have *3 women 1 pasar in the finance cubicle, and *2 women 50 ducks in the material management cubicle, the men are boosting and giving 10 pages of A4 size speeches on how the petrol hike will affect us in times to come.

Some are holding and pressing the calculator, some are using Excel worksheet to key in the formula, and some are digesting the newspaper.

The scenario looks like share market, and it went on for half an hour before they settle down to work.

Later, I found a lot of mails flying in, the Excel worksheet, the newspaper announcement, the demonstration pictures & so on.

Some positive thinkers view the petrol raise positively, less mat rempit to vroom around, less traffic jam, less pollution, less accident.

Some economy advisors are worrying, this will affect the consumers market, people will not eat out in the restaurant, will not buy car, will not buy property, will not travel, will not go for entertainment.

Sigh… we got to ‘reshape’ our lifestyle to cope with the petrol hike

Remarks : 3 women 1 pasar / 2 women 50 ducks– to describe the loud noise make by the women

My son V was not well, taking the advantage of company benefit, we went to company panel doctor. Am forcing V to bring all of his text books so that he can have revision in the queue, but to my surprised that only one patient was ahead of me. Two of the clinic assistants were swapping flies while another was doing nails filing.

Where are all the pretend to sick employees? I miss them walking pass my seat, looking fatigue, painful, distress, or worst case limping, groaning pain, shortness of breath, shaky, unsteady, stiff gait, toe walking & etc.

The name calling bring me back, enter and found the young locum doctor, I just told him V was having sore throat, coughing & flu. The doctor placed a thermometer on V’s forehead with his hair underneath. The doctor started scribbling on the card, and in the meantime he murmured ironically, ‘take less oiling food & drink plenty of water. ‘, then with the word OK he signaled us to go out.

The whole process took less than 2 minutes. Super fast and that was the reason why I miss all the ‘good’ show.

During my young days, we used to play pretend game, I love to play the role of doctor, I will ask my patient to stick out tongue to check on the throat, use stethoscope to listen the heart & lung, and use a handkerchief to wrap round patient arm and pretend to check their blood pressure.

What happen to nowadays’ doctor ? Has the procedure been void??

Doctor with super FAST speed

My son V was not well, taking the advantage of company benefit, we went to company panel doctor. Am forcing V to bring all of his text books so that he can have revision in the queue, but to my surprised that only one patient was ahead of me. Two of the clinic assistants were swapping flies while another was doing nails filing.

Where are all the pretend to sick employees? I miss them walking pass my seat, looking fatigue, painful, distress, or worst case limping, groaning pain, shortness of breath, shaky, unsteady, stiff gait, toe walking & etc.

The name calling bring me back, enter and found the young locum doctor, I just told him V was having sore throat, coughing & flu. The doctor placed a thermometer on V’s forehead with his hair underneath. The doctor started scribbling on the card, and in the meantime he murmured ironically, ‘take less oiling food & drink plenty of water. ‘, then with the word OK he signaled us to go out.

The whole process took less than 2 minutes. Super fast and that was the reason why I miss all the ‘good’ show.

During my young days, we used to play pretend game, I love to play the role of doctor, I will ask my patient to stick out tongue to check on the throat, use stethoscope to listen the heart & lung, and use a handkerchief to wrap round patient arm and pretend to check their blood pressure.

What happen to nowadays’ doctor ? Has the procedure been void??

When public holiday was not for us….

Tearing myself away from the slumber bed was painful, the whole Taman was still snoring while I did my routine brushing & washing.

On this day, I am experiencing like an ambulance driver, driving smoothly and fast without the siren. Making myself the early bird who catches the chance of turning on the office lighting for everybody, I just felt great and satisfying.

Unfortunately, good things does not always happen the ways it is, I only get 5 miserable mails in my in box, missing was the juicy mails and the ‘view in private’ mails. Obviously, the senders were still hugging their bolsters with saliva dripping on the pillow.

The phones boycotted by not ringing, newspapers were not delivered as the paper-man expected us to rest, only 0.001% of the companies were working, and yours truly were the lucky one.

To make the situation worst, 50% of our colleagues (not the boss) were on leave, we were the few that left behind to pretend working hard.

Waiting and waiting, as if our objective in work was waiting for 5pm. Definitely, I make sure that I am not the one who makes the boss proud by turning off the office light.

I can have both....

Being a free thinker sound something extra ordinary among the community around me. Friends, colleagues, relatives & neighbors will utter ‘hah ??? You have no god ??’

Two of my good friends were concerned & worried for me, one would like me to be with her & Jesus, another said Buddha preaching is good for me & family, I am indecisive whether to accept flowers & candles or roast pork, roast chicken, fruits & many more ‘peripherals’ in the after death’s life.

I was doubtful whether to dress up white with floral headdress , floating in the cloud, eating fruits & seeing white arch door as my home, or accepting unlimited money, credit card, bungalow, maid, car, or latest gadget like massage chair, foot massager, home theater, petrol station & etc.

Things have not been changed since then, my kids – blinking their constipated eyes with ignorant looking face asking why we have no god ? Sigh…. Was the word I responded.

Lately, my little 6 years old junior has reaches the same stage, he came round to me one day, asking whether I know how to pray to god ? I am kind of stunned, before I regain my conscious, he put both hands together and started the praying in Bahasa….

Being staunch in her religion, my maid would walk round with the bible with her, chanting song that praises Jesus, she pray as often as Muslim, even the 3am praying will not be spared.

My junior has since then gets the story telling of the mighty hero of Jesus, junior will repeat the story session to me while I tuck him to bed at night.

I have decided to stay where I am now, I may have both sons that would offer me flowers & candles, and roast pork, roast chicken etc. at times, I will be sent up there with white uniform, or being down there with life that are abundance… I grinned happily.

Waiting for Doctor ….

Seeing & waiting for Doctor can be dreaded, but there are ways for us to make full use of it.

As we can see, reading is one of the habits that doctors want their patient to cultivate, endless outdated & old magazines can be seen on the waiting area, instead of staring blankly on the white wall, most patients prefer to flip & scan thru the magazines, hopefully can find some sexy photos for brain stimulation.

Or patient can take a short nap under the free air-con for re-vitalization, or chatting & information exchange with other ke-poh (busybody) aunties, where conversation widely covers on cooking recipe, cosmetic that look 20 years younger, herbs that reduce 20 kgs in a week, place for cheap clothing, place for cheap household items, place where the naughty husband flirt around, place where the children will get all As, and the most important and interesting news will be chatting on others personal affair, e.g. doctor ‘tackling’ nurses, doctor has 2nd wife, doctor wears sandal, doctor’s misbehave children, etc. All these topics will add up on the spice of the conversation.
Knowing the human behavior, some doctors will spend some money for TV installation, keeping the patient eyes busy and in the same time preventing the ‘personal’ information being shared out.

Patients are too engrossed with the good TV program, their names are conveniently forgotten and the nurse has to check on their ID and drag them out from their seat.

Hahaha.… welcome to feedback if you have come across other benefit as well.

Web Sites that We Can’t Live Without

View thru my Xi Fu (master) blog lately, Xi Fu recommended one of the best web site - entitled “HowStuffWorks”, this is an easy-to-understand explanations of how the world actually works. Or something similar to encyclopedia, it was rated by Time Magazine as "25 Web Sites We Can't Live Without" in 2006 and 2007.

I kind of “Wao!!” and was truly impressed, invaluable vast knowledge will be gained just between fingers tips, from car engines to search engines, from cell phones to stern cells, thousands & thousands of subjects in between.

Later, I get to know ‘WonderHowTo’ website from my best friend, another Big Wao Wao!!, a community-fueled, search engine and directory for Free How-To Video. With an index of more than 100,000 free videos (as of March 2008).

Let’s not explain further, see it yourself and you will agree with me with a Wao !

Unused Item - Sell it for Money

At times, you notice that you have a lot of unused stuff in your cabinet, book shelves, store room, wardrobe, garage, attic or even underneath your bed. Things range from clothing, accessories, shoes, books, electrical items, toys, furniture, stationery & others.

If you convert it into value, you can actually buy the house next door. Yup… that’s the value you have spent over the years. In western countries, they used to have yearly garage sales or sell it to the 2nd hand shop.

Back in Malaysia, we can either donate it to the poor or sell it to the antique shop if the item is older than your great great grandmother.

I have come across some websites where we can actually put up our used item for sales, with this we can vacant at least 30% of our house space, do good for environmental for recycling and foremost earn some money. Sound great right ?

Let's action by visiting the following sites :

1. http://www.ebay.com.my/
2. http://www.lelong.com.my/

Good luck to you, but don't be tempted to buy the good & cheap thing in return and stock up another 50% of the house.

Man ??

MAN A, sole bread winner, wise man with good financial knowledge, take full charge of the home expenses & investment. Man knows the market well, save all possible penny on groceries, keep reasonably stock at home, Man’s chores including ‘ta-pao’ or take away food for dinner right after office work. Man claimed that more economically compare to home cook food, where it involves a lot of hidden cost.

MAN B, sole bread winner, important man as he runs >90% of the home errand, including prepare & send kids to school, send tuition, pay bills, and foremost -- cook dinner for whole family every night. Man has all the says at home.

The sun warms the buttock of the wife on the bed at 10 am, wife wakes up, she is busy with paddy cure, manicure, spa, yoga & many more sessions. Important to keep her self looks good so that man will not have roving eyes elsewhere. Wife go round neighborhood to keep abreast with the happening, sun glass is needed to protect eyes from the sparkling & glaring diamonds from her. She starts her chat with ‘My husband bla bla bla…my hubby bla bla bla….’.
Wife is proud of man and her man get popular & good name in the Taman or even neighboring Taman.

Cheng Beng & Mediumship

In remembrance of our dearly departed granny or Ah Poh, we do some prayer & offering during Cheng Beng (Qing Ming Jie), joss money or ‘Kim’ and paper accessories such as clothing & sandals, were burnt to ensure that granny has all her needs in the other world.

One of our aunts suggested checking the wellness of Ah Poh thru medium, and Ah Poh came alive by recognising and calling names of the presence, we were happy that she was the right granny.
Ah Poh said the sandals that she received were too big and cause her to fall, she prefer to have shoes instead.

Ah Poh said she would visit her sons whenever she is free? With curiosity my mom asked, ‘ah ma, how you come to my house where we stay so far away ?’

Being not too friendly Ah Poh replied ‘I have followed your car home before.’

With chill & uneasy feeling, we suddenly felt that this was not the Ah Poh we used to know, Ah Poh was actually blind and she needs guide or has she been cured in the other world?
She continued with an husky voice, ‘I shall visit again…in one or two day's time..’. With goose pimples all over, we kind of feeling spooky.

The session was ended, some going back with amazed on how true it was, some with doubtful question.

To be safe, Mom reminded both the maids that Ah Poh will be home and not to shoo away strange living things like butterfly, moth, dragonfly, grasshopper & frog in the house, it is Ah Poh who has transformed for the visit.

On the 2nd day, a big beautiful butterfly hovering the hall, kitchen & dining area. Both the maids were shivering with eerie feeling.

‘Ah Poh, Ah Poh… you don’t disturb us huh, we are only working here, please, please forgive us, we will ask madam to burn more more ‘money’ for you.’ said one of the maids.

Strange yah, should it be coincident or real ? ?

How to dry wet Shoes?

During raining day, your leather shoes get wet with the water sip in. Get some newspaper to cover it, and stuff the sole with newspaper. Paper is strong in absorbent, and it will dry up the shoes shortly.

A little is just nice, too much will kill….

Ever since I set bum on the seat of Business Development, there is a lot of fear that I need to overcome, being top ranking in the “Kia See” list, I think I will definitely die premature before the age of 100.

Sap sap shui (no problem) for me to handle the ground work on research, market survey, customer behaviour & etc., but when come to cold calling, it will some how create the uneasy feeling, unsettlement, uncertainty & even phobia of rejection.

During the cold calling session, my table will definitely loaded with ‘bibles’, documents, component samples, presentation files, fact sheets & other related and non related junks piled up like Komtar tower. Your $50 note will never find if you happen to drop it in those heaps of documents.

I need to tame down the butterfly in my stomach before the call, just the deep inhale of the coffee aroma will makes me feel alert, with one or two sips is good enough to boost my confident and enhance my performance, speech just pouring out like waterfall, saliva flying all over, full of promises, yes, yes, yes, can, can, can, and I am not myself but the politician who campaigning for the election.
The result of caffeine is marvellous.

Arranging too many cold calling means more coffee, over limit will cause me hyperactive and bouncing like a ball. My thumb will be shaking uncontrollably with the heart racing. Ambulance is needed to save me.
Sigh… A little is just nice, too much will kill….

Happen Once In a Year

Attended the income tax briefing again, the Senior Officer said, ‘there are 2 things in your life that you can not escape, 1st is death, 2nd is taxes’. He grins cunningly showing two of his top prominent canine teeth, that reminds me about Dragula.

Upon seeing him makes us poorer each year, wondering where will our blood be located after being suck by them ? Has they put them into good use ? More hospital? School? Spot & Recreation? community centres? Library? Mega project?
Or have I been benefited with the amenities & utilities provided?

Musing & tapping my fingers on the table, I should plan to exercise my right as a tax payer, General Hospital, Public Library, Recreation Park, Klinik Kesihatan, etc, etc, smiling and feeling self satisfaction for having such a brilliant idea.

I will schedule the plans, put the date after retirement age of 55 years, where I have all the times in the world to wait for the snail speed services, able to wait & queue 2 hours for the call of doctor, 1.5 hours for the dispensary, 0.5 hour for the librarian to write & stamp the date & so on.

Great !! I am paying it for the good course.

New Clothing – Wash before you wear

Textile treatment processes including breaching, dyeing, starching or metallic nanoparticles. In order to avoid skin allergic, sensitivity or others skin related problem, all new clothing purchase from the shelves should be washed before wearing it, and this will get rid of the excessive starch & dirt.